When Disney starts producing porn, we're all fucked

We've all seen the above image, or you should have on your travel around the Interwebs. It's almost true...alllllmost. It's not Disney that ruins girls for relationships (it sure as shit don't help) it's romance novels. Porn ruins boys. These are not hard and fast rules, but they're pretty damn accurate.

Look, I know most of my visitors are women, and most women don't like porn. As a woman who enjoys porn, let me enlighten you: 95% of it is pure, unadulterated shit, but that 5% is fantastic. However, hunting for that 5% gets tough, so you settle. And after a while, it strikes you: this is how most boys learn about sex. Given that fact, it's no surprise rates for female orgasms are damn low. So let's start with the easy one, and go over why porn is bad for boys: 

  • It teaches them all women are "size queens" who prefer big penises (less than 27% are)
  • It teaches them women desire penetration more than oral or manual sex (it's nice but oral is the best for us)
  • It teaches them women do not like breast stimulation (all breast implants cause loss of sensitivity of the nipple so actors don't bother with it)
  • It teaches them any woman exhibiting a strong sexual appetite is disposable/an object/a slut
  • It teaches them all women like to be treated that way (is anyone else screaming with me?)  

Believe it or not, porn is equally bad for women. Have you heard of porn made for women, by women? SKIP IT. It's nothing but...well, it's not worth describing, it's so bad. And sites like xHamster what have channels that are "women's choice"? Trust me, I don't think many women are into "cuckolding with big black cocks" and "mother seduces naughty daughter." However, most young women into porn are being told this is what they should like. 
 

These should not be role models or goals for anyone who doesn't like women crippled by back pain


This is not to say porn can't be good. Good porn, where the actors don't take themselves seriously, actually seem to have respect for one another, and are having fun can be quite arousing. However, it's meant for entertainment, yet is becoming the Kama Sutra of our time. I would give my eye teeth to fund a porn for young men that follows some basic factors:

  • The average penis size is best...and thickness is better than length
  • The average woman takes 20 minutes of foreplay to orgasm
  • Anal sex requires on average 30 minutes of warm-up and should never be done before vaginal sex
  • Blow jobs are fun and sexy...skullfucking is not
  • No woman wants to be called :slut" or "bitch" unless she specifically asks for it
  • Women orgasm most easily in the "woman-on-top" position
  • Breasts are not just for decoration, and natural are always better  

I think that porn would be enjoyed by men, women, and couples, and do a good job educating all the pubescent males who will get their hands on it.

It just figures the BBC already got this one

Now for romance novels...let me tell you a little secret. I hate writing erotic romances because they seem to end when the characters are in love. If you read my work on literotica you'll see I try to get the whole falling in love thing out of the way first then end it when the plot is resolved.

The main problems for women with romance novels are as follows:

  • They teach women all problems are solved by having a man (Ha! It tends to add more problems, actually)
  • It teaches women that every shy/awkward/clumsy girl can magically ensnare the perfect 10 hottie (if you're a 5 you're never getting a 10 unless you're a millionaire, let's be honest)
  • It teaches women that all good-looking well-groomed and well-built men are straight (sorry...most of those play for the other team, ladies)
  • It teaches women rape and ravishment are the same thing (ravishment is the #1 sexual fantasy of both genders: it's being lazy and getting pleasured. Rape is a dark nightmare no one should ever experience)
  • It teaches women that only men who are taller/stronger/smarter/more experienced can be sexy (becoming a "cougar" is simply when you grow up and realize that ain't true)  

The disturbing thing is that these come into play at adolescence and continue into later life. Even women in happy marriages are given this image or mold that suggests life would be perfect...with that cowboy, not the accountant that actually loves you and puts up with all your shit.

Are you noticing a pattern? Both romance novels and pornography are teaching men and women to reject reality, and pattern their expectations after fantasy. Be beautiful and you will be loved; pursue the artificially beautiful and you can treat it like shit.

I have hopes these things can change. I try to write my stories with a greater focus on plot than love or sex, but I do still follow many constraints of the sexist genre. In time, I hope it will change. I also hope in time porn will wake up and realize there's a market for doing things right.

Then again, as someone who watches porn and reads romance novels, maybe I believe in fantasy just a bit too much.

Nahhh...the watermark for "too much" has already been set